“Bookmarks Are for Quitters”

You know that moment when you tell yourself you’ll “just finish this chapter”?
Yeah. That’s how The Lord of the Rings turned into an accidental all-nighter and three broken snacks later you’re dehydrated, emotional, and 60% paper cut.

Let’s be honest: bookmarks are a myth invented by people who lie to themselves.
“Oh, I’ll stop here and come back later.”
Sure, Karen. And Gandalf’s just a guy with a stick.

Every reader has gone through the five stages of “I don’t need sleep, I need answers”:

Denial – “It’s only 10:30. I can read one more page.”

Bargaining – “If I finish this chapter, I’ll stop. Maybe.”

Acceptance – “I’m living like this now.”

Existential crisis – “Would I survive in this world? Probably not. But I’d look cool dying.”

The aftermath – Staring blankly at the ceiling at 3 a.m., emotionally destroyed, covered in crumbs, whispering “worth it.”

The next morning, you show up to school or work with the thousand-yard stare of someone who has seen too much.
Someone says, “You look tired.”
You just nod slowly and say, “They killed the wrong character.”

Bookmarks? Please.
If the author didn’t want us to read the whole thing in one sitting, they shouldn’t have written it so well.