A Week in Lunar Luxury: My Stay at The Mare Serenitatis Resort & Spa

I’ve stayed in some incredible places — floating hotels above Venus, budget capsules on Mars, even a bed-and-breakfast inside an asteroid belt once (don’t ask).
But nothing — and I mean nothing — compares to The Mare Serenitatis Resort & Spa, the Moon’s most exclusive destination for those seeking tranquility, cocktails, and 1/6th gravity indulgence.

Getting There

My flight with LunarLink Airways departed from Earth’s Orbit Terminal at precisely 08:42 UTC — because time zones get weird once you leave the planet.

The boarding process was smooth, except for one gentleman who insisted his emotional support drone didn’t need to be scanned. It did.

Arrival at the Moon Base Terminal is breathtaking. The view of Earth rising over the horizon is like nature saying, “Congratulations — you’re officially above all your problems.”

A luxury rover picked me up for the short ride to the resort. Think Range Rover meets NASA rover, but with champagne flutes and Wi-Fi that only lags when you look directly at it.

First Impressions

The Mare Serenitatis Resort sits in a shimmering glass dome, gleaming like a pearl against the gray lunar landscape. The architecture is part modern minimalism, part “villain’s lair you secretly want to live in.”

I was greeted by concierge drones named LUNA-7 and MARVIN, who handed me a cool towel and asked how I preferred my oxygen levels. I said “crisp, like fall air.” They delivered.

My suite overlooked the Sea of Serenity — and yes, it’s an actual sea, if you count ancient basalt plains and reflected Earthlight as water. The room had heated lunar stone floors, a zero-gravity reading pod, and a minibar stocked with dehydrated macarons and something called Earth nostalgia water ($65 per bottle).

Dining Among the Stars

The resort’s signature restaurant, Apogee, redefines “dinner with a view.” The glass ceiling offers an uninterrupted panorama of the cosmos — a nightly reminder that nothing pairs better with a medium-rare steak than existential insignificance.

The menu is a mix of interplanetary fusion cuisine:

• Martian truffle risotto (grown hydroponically in Olympus Mons greenhouses)
• Freeze-dried caviar rehydrated tableside
• Lunar lattes infused with actual stardust (or glitter — I didn’t ask)

The cocktails were equally cosmic. My favorite? The “Event Horizon” — dark rum, comet ice, and the faint taste of bad decisions.

Activities & Excursions

Days at Mare Serenitatis are perfectly designed for travelers who want to relax dramatically.

You can float-yoga in the low-gravity atrium (a great way to rediscover muscles you forgot existed), schedule a meteorite exfoliation treatment at the spa, or take a rover tour to the famous Apollo ruins.

I signed up for a moonlight hike — which is basically walking while looking profound. My guide assured me we were safe from lunar wolves, which, apparently, is a running joke. I laughed. Then checked twice.

Evenings are for stargazing lounges, live music from Earth broadcast with a 1.3-second delay, and other guests pretending they understand quantum art installations.

The Staff

Impeccable. Every staff member, from the human hospitality crew to the AI service drones, made me feel like a billionaire who just sold a planet.

One evening, I jokingly asked for “a sunset view.” The next day, they projected a high-definition holographic sunset into my suite — complete with the smell of distant rain and ambient cicadas.
That’s service.

The Downside

Gravity. You think low gravity is all fun and games until your martini glass floats into your hair.

Also, I don’t know who decided silver should be the resort’s “accent color,” but between the reflective floors and mirrored hallways, I saw my own face more than I saw the stars.

Oh — and yes, the mini-fridge hummed like it was plotting an uprising. Some things never change.

Departure

Leaving was the hardest part — partly because I forgot to book my return shuttle and partly because I’d gotten used to the gentle bounce of lunar walking.

As the rover took me back to the terminal, I looked up at the resort’s dome glowing against the eternal night and thought:
This must be what luxury feels like when you finally run out of world to conquer.

Final Verdict

Rating: 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌗 (4.5/5 Moons)

The Mare Serenitatis Resort & Spa is equal parts futuristic opulence and existential therapy session. Perfect for anyone who needs a vacation, a view of Earth, or a reason to never check their email again.

Would I go back? Absolutely.
But next time, I’m packing motion-stabilized martini glasses.

by PanAm – Lunar luxury reviewer, reluctant gravity enthusiast, and the only person to complain that the Moon had too much silver décor.